I have field work every Tuesday until the end of the month. The work itself is not too challenging – just taking water quality parameters. But the work can still be exhausting, especially if the equipment doesn’t work as it should or the well decides not to pump out water when you need it. And the site is three hours away, so it’s a six hour round trip plus five hours of work in the heat. Also, I wake up at 5:45 so I can let puppy run around and eat and raise his puppy havoc before I go. After I come back home, I have maybe 45 minutes to unwind before I take the pup to training classes at Petsmart.
Basically, I’ve been up for nearly 20 hours and exhausted, so naturally I’m WIDE AWAKE YOU ALL.
So I thought, what is the point of a self-improvement journal if I don’t actually update on any “improvements?”
Specifically, my goals for spring cleaning were:
1. Go through items I don’t need and give them away to friends or Goodwill. In progress. Kind of. There’s a pile of clothes and books that I still need to give away.
2. Find pretty, functional ways of improving my storage capacity and organization. In progress, kind of. I cleaned my closet and my office area and bought a very pretty storage box to hold keepsakes and mementos. I am pretty content with these areas.
3. Restrict myself from buying a book unless I have read/donated at least five in my personal library. I have bought maybe 4 or 5 books since this post, so…I need to work on this metric. A lot.
4. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, DO SOMETHING WITH MY PATIO. ANYTHING. YES I ACTUALLY DID SOMETHING WITH THIS ONE. Look!
I have plants out there too – aloe vera, the bamboo I bought when I first moved in my apartment three and a half years ago, and some sunflowers. The sunflower buds are wilting so I should probably water those…
This weekend I was involved in a discussion about “all the things” and how should a person juggle different projects and interests if she has so many of them. “I just do whatever I feel like at the time, whatever feeds my soul creatively,” one person said. I liked that a lot and helps me feel less guilty about abandoning some projects or interests in favor of others.
Lately I’ve been writing a lot. I received a book of writing exercises for my birthday along with a journal (I am obsessed with journals. Not even kidding – every time I go to a bookstore, I just stare at empty journals and want to buy all of them to take with me). I have been enjoying the book very much. I really want to try my hand at freelance work but I want to take it slowly. Right now, I’m just trying to get into the habit of writing frequently before defining more tangible writing goals.
I have been dissecting drum beats in my head for just about every song I listen to…I am so close to getting back to my kit. I think it is just a matter of time until I return to it.
If only I had a real kit. Sigh.
Lately I’ve been so fucking nostalgic about my marathon training group. This is a good thing. For a long time, the idea of running was generally disinteresting to me, but now I want to run distance again so badly. I went running last Saturday. I used to run my distance runs on Saturdays and while I did not run very long this time, it was a return to my old routine. I’ve been having crazy thoughts lately…thoughts of challenging myself again to a marathon. Why would I want to train for a marathon, after being burned out for so long? It doesn’t make any sense to me…but I have been missing those longer runs so badly lately.
And I miss challenging myself creatively and physically. I’ve dealt with my own challenges this past year and a half…raising puppy, and other things…but these were not creative or physical challenges. They were more of the, “You’re an adult, so deal with it” challenges. And these challenges weren’t all bad – I mean, I love my dog and I’m happy to have a little buddy (he’s currently sleeping next to me as I type this).
But there’s no need to abandon my personal and creative pursuits, even if work or life can get in the way sometimes. I’m happiest when I’m fulfilling creative and physical challenges. 2011 was such a great year for me because I tackled many of these challenges. I ran my marathon, got published in an online literature journal, and sang at a coffee shop for Open Mic night. What is stopping me from doing these things again? I have no excuse.